tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-80170095489900144732023-06-20T21:54:42.332-07:00Let's ShareAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13383594987131759128noreply@blogger.comBlogger29125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8017009548990014473.post-22403039444487089172014-12-04T03:37:00.002-08:002014-12-04T03:37:53.141-08:00Priorities!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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I like to lift weights every now and then. Too bad “now and
then,” is when I don’t have an active gym membership. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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Opening a gym and selling memberships is the quickest way to
get rich. I plan on opening a gym on December 31<sup>st</sup> and closing it at
the end of January every year. New Year resolutions peak and trough around that
interval. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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These days’ people are thinking beyond the mere criteria of
looking good. Individuals want to feel good. When did this transition occur?
They rather have great blood pressure readings, rather than a six pack. </div>
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<br /></div>
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Priorities….<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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What is it about rankings and its monogamous ties to
priorities? Why do people think they always have to do the most important thing
first? I personally love to hold off on the most important task at hand. First
you watch TV, then you drink coffee, then you eat breakfast, then you go to
work. No one wants to see you naked at work. It’s common sense. Life has taught
us this principle since day 1. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<br />
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I feel sorry for those who are unemployed. Unemployment is a
time for reflection and growth in ability to harness rejection. This is why it
is a great time to meet a significant other. Since you’re immune to rejections,
you can’t get hurt. <o:p></o:p></div>
</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13383594987131759128noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8017009548990014473.post-50289407211299448532014-05-25T05:43:00.000-07:002014-05-25T05:43:10.070-07:00Apple drops some tunes. <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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Dr. Dre, the first billionaire in hip hop? <o:p></o:p></div>
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Apparently a<a href="http://blogs.marketwatch.com/thetell/2014/05/23/apples-beats-deal-is-happening-and-its-all-about-dr-dre-and-jimmy/"> deal was signed</a> between Beats ® and Apple ®. I
am not sure of the details regarding the deal, however, it sounds like it made
Dre a billionaire. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Dre’s celebration video might not be to Apple’s liking
however. <o:p></o:p></div>
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Apple, this is what happens when you try to excel in the “cool”
market. Get used to it.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Steve Job’s might be “poppin’ bottles,” upstairs right now. <o:p></o:p></div>
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Meanwhile, downstairs [main level – not bottom floor], Apple
sounds upset. <o:p></o:p></div>
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I could imagine Bill Gates doing something similar with
Microsoft ®. However, I doubt its aim would ever be to cater to “coolness.”
They have the XBOX ® taking care of that arena.<o:p></o:p></div>
<br />
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Microsoft®…. I’m thinking Bose ® headphones. You all need to
stay on par with competition, while maintaining professionalism. </div>
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<o:p></o:p></div>
</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13383594987131759128noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8017009548990014473.post-28224766877533578572014-04-10T21:37:00.002-07:002014-05-25T05:15:09.719-07:00Priorities<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Movement towards legalization of "illicit" products, such as Marijuana, is occurring at a very fast rate. As an American, I'm concerned about the well-being of my fellow nationals. Alcoholism and Smoking already pose a deleterious risk factors for humans all over the world. American's, however, have a huge issue with obesity. Legalizing natural resources that induce both a physiologic & metabolic mechanism known as the "munchies," might not be the best course of action.<b> The nation's primary concern should be placing surgeon general warnings on Debbie Snacks. </b></span><br />
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<a href="http://img.addfunny.com/funnypictures/fatkidrainbows/38/theyseemerollin.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://img.addfunny.com/funnypictures/fatkidrainbows/38/theyseemerollin.jpg" height="320" width="246" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b><br /></b></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13383594987131759128noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8017009548990014473.post-60637854509783887032014-04-05T23:11:00.001-07:002014-04-05T23:11:43.019-07:00It is what it is. <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
I just got back from a wedding. Weddings can be annoying since you probably will not know half of the individuals there. However, this wedding was decent. The set up and location was very nice. <br />
<br />
Whenever I go to weddings, I like to stand/sit alone and see what kind of crowd I attract. I got the opportunity to sit next to 4 kids between ages 8-10 and 3 new friends who are 8 years younger than me.<br />
<br />
It was amazing. </div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13383594987131759128noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8017009548990014473.post-8609502229719301092014-03-31T05:25:00.003-07:002014-03-31T05:29:22.852-07:00Top 2 Public Icons<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Why is Bill Clinton one of my favorite presidents? Is it
because he actually improved our economy or kept military expenses to a
minimum? You would think so, however, no, those are not my top 10 reasons for
keeping Bill Clinton in my list of favorite top 2 public figures. All it took
was a few wonderfully crafted and meaningful </span><a href="http://politicalhumor.about.com/cs/quotethis/a/clintonquotes.htm"><span style="color: #0563c1; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">sentences</span></a><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">:
</span></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span lang="EN" style="mso-ansi-language: EN;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">"Politics
gives guys so much power that they tend to behave badly around women. And I
hope I never get into that." ~President Clinton addressing a female as a
Rhodes Scholar at Oxford. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span lang="EN" style="mso-ansi-language: EN;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">"When I was
in England, I experimented with marijuana a time or two, and I didn't like it.
I didn't inhale and never tried it again." ~President Clinton</span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span lang="EN" style="mso-ansi-language: EN;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">"What's a
man got to do to get in the top fifty?" ~Mr. Clinton’s reaction to a poll
journalists formulated, ranking Monica’s scandal as the 53rd most significant
story during the past 100 years. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span lang="EN" style="mso-ansi-language: EN;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">"It depends on
how you define alone…" ~ President Clinton, during his testimony in 1998
regarding the Lewinsky scandal.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span lang="EN" style="mso-ansi-language: EN;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">“"There were
a lot of times when we were alone, but I never really thought we were." ~ also
Mr. Clinton, during his grand jury testimony</span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span lang="EN" style="mso-ansi-language: EN;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">"It depends
on what the meaning of the words 'is' is." ~Mr. Clinton- testimony</span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span lang="EN" style="mso-ansi-language: EN;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">"You know,
if I were a single man, I might ask that mummy out. That's a good-looking
mummy" ~ President Clinton while eyeing "Juanita," a recent
archeological finding of an Incan mummy showcased at the National Geographic Museum</span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span lang="EN" style="mso-ansi-language: EN;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">As you can see
from the above quotes, that we were blessed to have a true leader for 8 years
prior to our economic crash. Not only did he look out for those who desperately
needed employment, but also those who simply wanted something to do [ a man of
equal opportunity]: <br />
"The economy has produced 6.1 million jobs since I became president, and
if Michael Jordan comes back to the Bulls, it will be 6,100,001 jobs."~
President Clinton. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span lang="EN" style="mso-ansi-language: EN;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">He took care of
himself, and taught us as a leader, no matter what kind of position you are in,
be prepared for the future [George W. Bush/Obama etc.]: "Well, I don't
have much job security." ~Bill Clinton response in 1992 after being asked why
he still plays the saxophone.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span lang="EN" style="mso-ansi-language: EN;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">My number 1 public
figure is Shaquille O’Neal: </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UVnqv7YDQr8">https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UVnqv7YDQr8</a></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span><span lang="EN" style="mso-ansi-language: EN;"><span style="font-size: large;">It’s not just the
above video, but more in regards to how he can be found- re-watching himself &
laughing- in a public location [I can’t disclose] in Atlanta immediately after
filming his TNT show.</span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8lhkS2oWux8">https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8lhkS2oWux8</a></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13383594987131759128noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8017009548990014473.post-80912447955941415312014-03-30T15:54:00.001-07:002014-03-31T05:28:02.248-07:00glade ®: Brisa Hawaiana ® <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">I bought some Hawaiian breeze ® flavored glade ®. It wasn’t
anything like Hawaii. I’ve never been to Hawaii, but it didn't remind me of
that page in my September issue of </span><a href="http://www.travelandleisure.com/"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Travel Magazine</span></a><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"></span><br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">So just imagine walking
down this aisle full of flowery flavors, and all of sudden you have a scent
resembling a state’s breeze added to the US in 1959.</span><br />
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"></span><br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"> I got concerned for two
reasons:</span><br />
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">1. Glade® at the time was marketing “new soft mist.” However capturing
Hawaii’s breeze completely replaced the intent of ROA leverage from dollars invested
in R&D which went into producing this “new soft mist” product. I’ve never
been in contact with hard mist, so I’m assuming the research & development
of that product must have not cost more than the pencil of a glade ® marketer. </span><br />
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">2. My next point of concern….I was wondering what glade had to negotiate with the United States to give up ® Hawaii's Breeze? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"></span><br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Does </span><a href="https://www.scjohnson.com/en/home.aspx"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">S.C Johnson & Son</span></a><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"> own the United States?</span> </div>
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<o:p></o:p><br /></div>
</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13383594987131759128noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8017009548990014473.post-16627782601411107572014-03-20T08:54:00.002-07:002014-03-20T08:54:32.550-07:00Fun times Cooking:<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<object width="320" height="266" class="BLOGGER-youtube-video" classid="clsid:D27CDB6E-AE6D-11cf-96B8-444553540000" codebase="http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=6,0,40,0" data-thumbnail-src="https://ytimg.googleusercontent.com/vi/l3_lEKkmLOg/0.jpg"><param name="movie" value="https://youtube.googleapis.com/v/l3_lEKkmLOg&source=uds" /><param name="bgcolor" value="#FFFFFF" /><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true" /><embed width="320" height="266" src="https://youtube.googleapis.com/v/l3_lEKkmLOg&source=uds" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true"></embed></object></div>
Zucchini Wraps: </div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13383594987131759128noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8017009548990014473.post-47984932927259254962013-12-20T15:56:00.004-08:002013-12-20T15:58:40.194-08:00Gush. Just J-E-L-L-O<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">“I don’t want to be just one thing. I want to be brave, and honest, and
intelligent, and kind.” Yes this is taken directly from Theo James, known as <i>“Four”</i> in the movie Divergent. He utters
these sweet words to Shailene Woodley, also known as <i>“Beatrice ‘Tris’ Prior”.</i> If you watch the preview this is the
moment where he exposes his back tattoo without <i>Tris</i> asking him to. The tattoo is a mess and unfocused, very much
like the opening quote of this blog. At the bottom of the tattoo is a tree
symbol; a symbol very similar to the Timberland logo. It all clicked. He is
known as ‘Four’ because that is the size of his work boots. Holla Holla. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">At the end of the movie, he pulls a mission impossible and removes his
face mask. It was Ken Jeong the whole time. I’m not Dr. Schulz, but I can
safely say the brother was on heels and ‘gellin’</span>…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13383594987131759128noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8017009548990014473.post-40630197403236457022013-12-19T16:39:00.002-08:002013-12-19T16:39:32.609-08:00Eagle<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">I wonder why it is so tough to land a starring role in a
good movie. Probably because you suck at acting and whatever movie you star in,
never becomes a good movie. So quit complaining. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Thank God for the intense selection criteria “<i>Hollywood” </i>implements. They turn people
I use to respect into slugs. Take Adam Sandberg for example; an individual who
was called to Harvard to give the new grads a farewell speech. It was beautiful,
hilarious, and original. Many of his songs were nothing short of classical. Has
anyone seen worse humor on the tube then on the show <i>Brooklyn Nine-Nine?</i> Whoever is writing those scripts is ruining Mr.
Sandberg’s career. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">I really like that show <i>The
Blacklist. </i>At times my ethical conscience drips guilt in my heart and makes
me turn it off. Yes, this is a show about a man who helps the FBI find
the most wanted criminals in the world. They call this list of criminals “The
Blacklist.” No comment. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">I think the biggest criminal in the world is the individual
involved in distributing endless free ice cream coupons in the mail. Who’s
paying Wendy off? No pun intended. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">You know our economy is improving when USPS delivers your
goods after sunset. I hate using sarcasm in my writing. Thus you know I truly
mean everything I say. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">;)</span><o:p></o:p></div>
</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13383594987131759128noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8017009548990014473.post-44406290537229585612013-12-19T05:35:00.000-08:002013-12-19T05:35:12.095-08:00Felitsa<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">OOOOOOOOOOOKKKKAAYY! So our population is growing, it is
insane. What is going on? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">It’s not that bad in America. Why is that? In China and
India, it’s uncontrollable. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">I believe I know what the problem is. In America, unfortunately,
many people meet at bars and areas where alcohol is served. This allows
individuals to lower their standards, and end up with a significant other they
would never want to see the outcome of a genetic combination. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">In China and India, they don’t use alcohol as much. They go
to coffee shops. Sharpen their senses. Some coffee shops probably give them
ADHD medications to enhance their attention skills. This allows them to select
the most fertile individual in the room; a genetic combination which will
assist in producing the next Yiànnis Hryssomàllis. </span><o:p></o:p></div>
</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13383594987131759128noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8017009548990014473.post-73676843347852167622013-12-18T15:32:00.001-08:002013-12-18T15:32:57.055-08:00Womb<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">What does a blanket do? It makes us warm by trapping heat.
The blanket itself does not emit heat. So why does a thicker blanket help us
stay warmer. It really boils down to the quality of the blanket and how much
thermal preservation the material provides. Unfortunately, I was severely disappointed
that no one at bed bath and beyond could tell me this. I would
think that would be the first question in the interview. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">People should know about the products they sell and to whom. Clothing Retail Stores manage to do an excellent job in this. They make their sales
associates know everything about everything.
My first retail job experience required me to enter with an open mind.
It also required me to maintain that lack of ignorance. The manager wanted us
to try on all the male jeans so we know how to explain the fit to the
customers. I did this with no problem. He then asked us to try on the women
jeans. No way would I allow myself to try on garments which required one to
have hips designed for birth. My career in retail was cut short. </span><o:p></o:p></div>
</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13383594987131759128noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8017009548990014473.post-75973758183915750072013-12-17T04:34:00.000-08:002013-12-17T04:34:25.377-08:00Lamp<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">It’s December and the weather is wonderful….I don’t think
this is a good sign. Losing seasons just doesn’t seem right. It disrupts the
homeostasis of people with seasonal affective disorder (SAD). Light therapy
products would lose demand and businesses would be forced to close. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">That’ll be good though, people with SAD would be cured.
People who manufactured products to cure SAD would be out of a job. This would
make them “sad.” They will turn to anti-depressants and it’ll be a <i>Prozac nation. </i>Then we will have a bunch
of people who are super happy, breathing in ozone and oxidants. Dido’s songs would sound so much better,
sunny, and more enthusiastic. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">“<i>If you give me just a
coin for every time we say goodbye<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i>Well I’d be rich
beyond my dreams, …” </i> <i>Dido- <b>I’m
no Angel</b></i> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">What an optimist!!!! :)</span><o:p></o:p></div>
</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13383594987131759128noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8017009548990014473.post-81850140417327323872013-12-16T05:03:00.002-08:002013-12-16T05:03:56.117-08:00Bread<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpFirst">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">How can we be sure of
it? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">What can we do to never
look back and have confidence that it was done?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">The iron is off. The
stoves are off. No toast in the toaster. The browsing history is cleared. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Do you need that
constant re-assurance? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">We all have times where
we need to be reminded. It gets annoying when someone is constantly reminding
us. For example, when we see someone like miley cyrus and Justin bieber, we get
an instant reminder of how blessed we are to not be them. With them selling
billions of records and being on every wall in public places, I’ve never felt
so thankful in my life. My body has “adapted” to the feeling of thankfulness. I
no longer acknowledge it. When someone gives me a gift, I don’t even say thank
you anymore. You can blame that on Miley Cyrus and Bieber Fever. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">I went to a third world
country and I needed to make some passport photos. They asked me what template
I wanted. On each passport sized photo, there was a picture of Justin Bieber.
Yes, this was a country in which English is not the first language. I
understand billboard, but broken down photo store in the middle of nowhere? I
have to question the intentions of the store owners. I feel like maybe R. Kelly
has invested in a chain of passport photo shops. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">What’s up with rap
music these days? It’s worthless, unless you have a significant other. Copy-paste
the lyrics and throw it on a hallmark card. Best seasons greetings. If you
never want to see him or her again. </span><o:p></o:p></div>
</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13383594987131759128noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8017009548990014473.post-90467700133059734132013-12-11T12:33:00.003-08:002013-12-11T12:33:35.117-08:00Coins<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">There is this third world country. They elected a president
who likes to push people until they complain and stand up for their rights. He
created a toll road. He charged 1 currency for the path. No one complained. He
raised it to two currencies. Maybe two or three people said something to the
individuals manning the toll booths. He then raised it to five currencies and
got the workers manning the toll booth to hit all drivers with a shoe once. No
one complained. He wanted his people to stand up for their rights and have the
toll booth removed, they just had to ask. The president then took it up a notch
and raised it to 6 currencies and 5 hits by the shoe. Frustrated citizens went
to visit the president to finally complain. The president was excited. He has
been waiting for this moment. He was proud to see his countrymen to stand up for
their beliefs. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">The citizens walked up to the president and said, “Mr.
President, the toll booth is causing us problems. It is really slowing down
traffic by having one person hit us five times; it would be easier if you had
five people hitting us once each. Traffic would be a lot smoother.” </span><o:p></o:p></div>
</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13383594987131759128noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8017009548990014473.post-83530093094557127912013-12-08T17:49:00.003-08:002013-12-08T17:49:37.777-08:00Aluminum<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">When I sit under my thinking tree and reflect. My thoughts are
usually focused on various types of bug sprays I can purchase from CVS. These
sprays would allow me to truly forget my surroundings and enter a deeper level
of thought. This deeper level of thought would allow me to plan ahead for next
time, and come prepared with my bug spray in hand. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">When I listen to Sade, I realize the relationship I have
with my tree is not an “ordinary love.” In fact, I feel like I should see a
therapist.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Horses are angelic creatures that can take you from point A
to point B without gasoline. Nissan’s next vehicle is going to have a fully
loaded aluminum container attached to 3 horses. The Prius would have intense
competition, Al Gore would create another environmentalist documentary, and Obamacare
would not be able to cover from the new cases of Salmenollosis and
Cryptosporidium in new Nissan Owners.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">I went to purchase a Toyota corolla. The sales man popped
the hood to show us the engine. He made the corolla sound like a Ferrari.
Turned out the corolla did have a few similar features a Ferrari has: They both
can really only seat two people comfortably. </span><o:p></o:p></div>
</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13383594987131759128noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8017009548990014473.post-60731853190293069552013-12-08T15:54:00.001-08:002013-12-08T15:54:40.672-08:00N900<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Technology is updating at an amazing pace. I’m watching tv
streamed from my computer through a device known as chromecast. Basically
anything you want to broadcast from google chrome to your tv (Netflix, hulu,
simple browsing), you can wirelessly view via any wifi compatible device;
including a smartphone. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">What’s next? I would really like a device which can
wirelessly wake me up, brush my teeth, feed me breakfast, clean my room, and
drop me off to work. I would say having a spouse could fulfill these needs,
however spouses are not wireless. For some reason they are always tied to you. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Think about the benefits of having a wireless wife. You can
always turn off the wifi when you feel like you need a break from the
connection. You could easily change the password to the wifi so she can’t
connect to the signal. It wouldn’t take much distance before you are out of
range from any sort of connection. Resetting the connection, might allow your
wife to forget all your past mistakes. Adding additional routers and signal
boosters could possibly connect you to more wives. The possibilities are
endless. </span><o:p></o:p></div>
</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13383594987131759128noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8017009548990014473.post-13072372450998718062013-12-01T05:36:00.003-08:002013-12-01T19:04:29.172-08:00Miley GO AWAY<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">So what happens when you want to do something intelligent?
You get super motivated and automatically gain 1 hour of intense energy. Your
mind is working out. It is hitting the gym and dunking on Shaq. You open the
laptop, go straight to lumosity or khan academy. You order 8 languages on
rosetta stone. You buy a book shelf to place your new products. The hour is up,
you just lost $300+ and have a new shelf in your home. You buy some roses, get
stoned, and speak butchered Spanish which was taught in the first 30 seconds of
the intro CD. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">CD’s are getting played out. We now have MP3’s. What
happened to 8 tracks? Let’s digitize 8 tracks and sell them. I want to see Jay
Z’s new album on an 8 track. I want to see the Tesla have a 6- 8 Track changer.
Why do we always have to move forward in life? What’s wrong with moving
backwards? We will all end up like Miley Cyrus. Let’s take a step back and reflect…..does
Miley Cyrus not scare you? If she can change from a Disney actor to her current
state, what’s to prevent her from becoming a murderer? She needs to be contained.
She’s the only reason Gitmo needs to remain open. Our number one threat is
Miley. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">I haven’t seen a good Disney movie in such a long time.
Digitize my friends, don’t create new products. When you have a classic like
Aladdin, don’t leave it incompatible with HDTV’s- upgrade that bad boy to 1080
pixels. Aren’t you curious to the embroidery on “Abu’s” hat? Forget that, the
magic carpet can offer us so much more. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Intelligence is rare these days. Kids are dropping out of
school. School is expensive, Obama is an idiot. You need to make school free.
You need to provide all life’s essentials for free to all students:
Transportation, health insurance, food, shelter, clothing, etc. Drop outs would
have to be the biggest idiots in the world. They usually drop out for surviving
and coping with life stresses. Link education with survival necessities, and you might
have some more immigration issues, increased job competition, and less of a
disparity among the rich and poor. Uncle Sam would be pissed.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">I hate how congress beats around the bush and never tackles
our nation’s biggest concerns. First-class airline tickets are getting more and
more expensive. Why is this? This needs to stop. We all deserve first-class.
Would it hurt delta to throw a little more leather on all their seats, widen
the economy section up, and maybe offer us unlimited fruit throughout the
flight. Instead I’m sitting next to a “soon to be companion and life partner
for the next 1.5 hours” whose shoulders have nowhere else to go aside from
rubbing against mine. I have never had more bromance in my life. It’s great for
gay people, which is probably why there has not been a change in the management
of this crisis. If you want something done in this world, go through
homosexuals. They open the doors to congress. Please Gay people, help us out
with this first-class crisis. Anderson Cooper, if this isn’t breaking news, I
don’t know what is. </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
</div>
</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13383594987131759128noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8017009548990014473.post-41077117122185304572013-11-18T15:33:00.003-08:002013-11-18T15:33:36.231-08:00CROUTON (S)<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div style="text-align: left;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">I went to whole foods the other day. I walk in like a boss.
I got a step which lets people know, Nutrition is NO GAME. I’m here for the
wheat and coconut water. One ounce of pressurized Carbon Dioxide in my beverage
is unacceptable and leaves my face with an intense sign of disgust. I check out
with a toothbrush made of 100% recyclable material and mouthwash that vaporizes
upon a 1 minute rinse. I feel good. Reputation has been cashed in. Unlock my
bicycle in the front, ride around the back. Dump that junk in the trash-
including the bicycle. Roll out with a masking hoody in my Diesel Fuel- environmentally
inefficient vehicle. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13383594987131759128noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8017009548990014473.post-66910685356765889742013-10-12T07:51:00.001-07:002013-10-12T07:54:03.597-07:00nuance<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Waking up is probably one of the biggest challenges in my
day. I keep trying to think of what is a good way to motivate someone to wake
up. It’s definitely not brushing your teeth. You brush your teeth to put
yourself to sleep. Not to wake up. It can’t be the shower. They recommend that
you shower in warm water if you have trouble sleeping. So what is it? It has to
be something that affects you from a life or death perspective. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What could this be? Only one thing comes in
mind. Only one thing which is lethal and powerful enough to make sure you stay
on tract. Does the term 10:30AM ring a bell? Yes. This is the time when almost
all fast-food chains quit serving breakfast. Who would have thought McDonald’s
promotes productivity. McDonald’s cares about us. They want us to live. If you
are wondering whether I have tears in my eyes, the answer is yes. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"></span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">What makes people tear up? Tears are affected by pain,
emotion, and chemicals. I’m fascinated with the concept of crying, specifically
crying on command. How do people do this? This is a true gift from God. We have
so much of our national budget going into research, why have we not discovered
the cause of this yet? Screw heart disease and osteoporosis. What causes people
to have the super natural powers of crying on command? Is this a genetic trait?
If so, what chromosome is responsible for this talent? I would think by now Natural Selection would
have favored the promotion of this trait. If you were born with this skill, stop
studying, stop working hard, and retire. Cry yourself to success. Whoever comes up with a "vitamin" to aid crying on command, you will be a millionaire.</span> </span></div>
</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13383594987131759128noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8017009548990014473.post-79133972538656514382013-09-26T07:25:00.002-07:002013-09-26T07:25:21.921-07:00Yelp<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">I was at a friends house playing video games. His mom came in and told him to clean his room. Somehow after that command, I thought I was in my own home. I got up and started making the bed. What is it about the authority of a mother. I feel like it is a universal figure. It doesn't matter whose mother the command comes from, all children must obey. Obama's got nothing on Michelle. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Authority is something I feel is abused in many situations. I think an IQ test should be administered to grant privileges and authority. Many people can work their way up the ladder and hold a position of authority. Idiots should not be telling a mind of intelligence what to do. There are garbage men who have a natural intelligence superseding individuals with a graduate education. What I'm trying to say is don't tell me how to take out my trash. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Do you know how many people ride bikes? If you do, you should be asking yourself the following questions: </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">1. Why do I know this?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">2. How do I spend my day? </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">3. Do I even own a bike? </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">4. What is todays date? </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">5. Who am I? </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">I hate when your sitting at home and you forget what day it is. I know why they place the date and time on the windows tab. Whoever thought of that was a genius. I'm assuming it was Steve Jobs.</span> </div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13383594987131759128noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8017009548990014473.post-82312650457112928832013-09-22T05:07:00.003-07:002013-09-22T05:09:35.161-07:00non-sense<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Green tea has a ton of antioxidants. We should all drink it.
Unless we pick up a book and read that- *most likely*- the only natural substance that actually
helps our body is fish oil. The vitamin business is insanely fraudulent. You
need an apple, a few veggies, and a bite of chicken wrapped in toast; top it
off with a glass of milk. Done. Not only is this business fraudulent, it’s out
of context. This business is not needed in this country. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">The UN drops off a bag of flour and TB meds every now and
then in Africa. What are they thinking! Yeah, the most poverty drenched nation
has frosting and sprinkles with an oven pre-heated to 350 degrees, they just
need some flour to finish making their cake. They need our vitamins!</span> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13383594987131759128noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8017009548990014473.post-49697473778846941452013-09-20T14:24:00.003-07:002013-09-20T14:24:49.730-07:00couscous<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I like to grill out a lot. Whoever is doing the grilling
never gets to eat much, but they do receive a lot of respect. It’s a skill. It
takes an individual willing to damage his respiratory system to take on this
task. If he keeps it up, within 5 months, he’ll probably die from emphysema.
His death however would be honorable. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Outdoor activities are fun when there aren’t any mosquitos
or UV radiation; basically remove all the properties of our atmosphere and keep
the insect free grass. This is why I hate college football and love NFL domes.
If we have the technology to protect ourselves from mother-nature, why don’t
we?<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Technology is developing at a very rapid pace. We have LED
TV’s that are paper thin, eye wear that has GPS on it, and even robotic
surgery. I decided to quit school once I discovered every single discipline of
knowledge based skills will soon be replaced by robots. I’m investing my loan
money in a couple of robots and Bill Gates genome. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The study of human genes is going to allow medicine to
become more personalized. Certain drugs work differently on certain
individuals, due to their genetic make-up. Basically what I’m trying to say, if
you’re an Ashkenazi Jew, Asian, or African American, you’re screwed. They will
know if you have Tay-Sachs, a thalassemia, or sickle cell. If they prove a
genetic link to obesity, white people are screwed too. Good luck getting
insured with that codon. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Why is this world so mean? Why can’t we distribute our
wealth equally? And yes, when I say wealth, I mean Adderall. If we gave more Adderall
to homeless populations, maybe they could think their way out of their
situation and find some success. They don’t need your food or money, they need
focus!!! A lamb can provide you with food clothing and shelter; we can’t just
give everyone a lamb. Adderall is cheaper and will do a better job.</span> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13383594987131759128noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8017009548990014473.post-60288539747741073852013-09-20T05:25:00.000-07:002013-09-20T05:25:02.238-07:00serious?<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I wish the school bus system was still available to college
students and the corporate world. It would increase employment and no one would
ever be late to work. Bus driving would be a dream for children. “<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">The Magic School Bus</i>” would have a whole
new meaning. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Frequent tardiness to work can get you fired. If you know
you are going to be tardy every day, just stay at home and collect welfare
checks. It’ll be better for you. Fly to Switzerland, open a bank account.
Deposit all your checks there. Make a rap song about your Swiss bank account
and retire. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Why do checks have your home address and phone number on it?
I went to a video rental store and paid for <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Life
of Pi</i> by check. I go home and I receive a phone call at 10pm, “Hey bro is
this *****?” I respond with a “Yes.” “Oh dude how was that movie, did you like
it? Man the lion was crazy wasn’t he?" I was like “who the hell is this?! And!
I did not watch it yet!” Next day same guy is sitting in my driveway, trying
to watch the movie with me. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Loneliness is something everyone battles with at least once
in their lives. I strongly urge you to not consider a check as an invite to
cure your loneliness. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Does anyone have friends who use a lot of cologne? You’re
lucky. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">I had a friend; for months I thought he was addicted to
cocaine. I tried to get him checked in a rehab center, turned him into the
police, told his mom, tazed him, nothing was working. He would always have
white powder all over the back of his neck, on his face, and shirt. He was
making irrational decisions like hanging out with me and eating lunch before
breakfast. He finally caved and told me what was going on. He was addicted to
baby powder. Yes, Johnson & Johnson, you have adult consumers; congrats-
start a new line.</span> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13383594987131759128noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8017009548990014473.post-72321111718690459272013-09-19T18:43:00.001-07:002013-09-19T18:44:27.726-07:00toys<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Why can’t people with accents discern their pronunciations
and how it differs from the people surrounding them? If they could, maybe
countries would start electing presidents who have more proficient universal
language skills. The reason why we don’t have world peace is not because we can’t
agree on a common ground, it’s because we have no clue what others are trying
to say. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Peace is a beautiful concept. I try to bring a little
harmony to humanity every single day. Everyone should. Break up fights, take a
bullet for someone else, or eat a fat kid’s dessert. If we don’t do it who
will? <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I hate violence. It hurts me to see individuals channeling
their frustration’s towards inflicting physical pain on others. Do they not
know there are so many other ways you can hurt someone? Don’t respond to text
messages, yell at sales representatives when they call you, throw stuff, tell
your friends they are worthless, call Bosley hair transplant services and give
them the names and numbers of all your bald friends. Just don’t hit anyone!<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Text messaging has gotten out of hands. I literally mean
that. I don’t even need my hands to text any more. I feel like we don’t use the
phone the same anymore. A phone is a device which has digits and you put up
against your mouth and ears. That is the definition of a phone. With blue tooth
and siri, we no longer have a phone. We need a new name! That’s copyright
infringement. We can call it Blutsi. “Excuse me sir do you have a Blutsi I can
use.” <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Sure madam, just be careful
saying the word fuss; autocorrect has a way with that.”</span> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13383594987131759128noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8017009548990014473.post-9761375207386303012013-09-19T13:43:00.000-07:002013-09-19T14:41:06.043-07:00sizzle<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">What is swag? Swag is something that comes with practice. I
wake up in the morning and I got auqafresh for my top teeth and colgate for my
bottom teeth. I put my socks on backwards and draw a heart over my point of maximal impulse (5<sup>th</sup>
rib mid-axillary line). These two commodities are for inner confidence.
Something you know about but the public won’t be able to see. This is known as
hidden swag. <o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"></span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">When you go on a plane buy two tickets; one business and one
first class. Make sure to rotate between seats every 30 minutes. Order a meal
in first class and ask the flight attendant to deliver it to you while you are
in the business class seat. This allows your business passengers to realize
your level of swag. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"></span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">Call your credit card company and tell them to increase your
interest rates, and never give you reward points again. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"></span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">Run into Donald Trump and give him a Gold trumpet. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"></span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">This is swag. Pour hot chocolate on hot chocolate. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"></span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Peace.</span> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13383594987131759128noreply@blogger.com0