What is swag? Swag is something that comes with practice. I
wake up in the morning and I got auqafresh for my top teeth and colgate for my
bottom teeth. I put my socks on backwards and draw a heart over my point of maximal impulse (5th
rib mid-axillary line). These two commodities are for inner confidence.
Something you know about but the public won’t be able to see. This is known as
hidden swag.
When you go on a plane buy two tickets; one business and one
first class. Make sure to rotate between seats every 30 minutes. Order a meal
in first class and ask the flight attendant to deliver it to you while you are
in the business class seat. This allows your business passengers to realize
your level of swag.
Call your credit card company and tell them to increase your
interest rates, and never give you reward points again.
Run into Donald Trump and give him a Gold trumpet.
This is swag. Pour hot chocolate on hot chocolate.
Peace.
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